Once upon a time, there was a man who was a single parent. He was smart and knew how to cook, too. One day, he was wandering though the refrigerator forest and exclaimed "A chicken! I can make chicken soup!" He took the chicken and put it in a pot and filled it full of water. Then he put in some pearl onions and some celery. He then took it to the big bad stove.

When he arrived at the stove with the pot of water, he saw four burners, the Papa burner, the Momma burner (there was two of these, was the stove practicing burner polygamy?,) and a baby burner. The man decided that he would put the chicken in the pot on the Papa burner, so it would boil fast. It did, with a rush of bubbles and rendered chicken fat. He turned down the Papa burner to let it simmer, and went upstairs.

The man was tired, so after a day of answering email, he went to bed. And very late at night, he woke up to the scent of roasted chicken. Surely this was a dream in smellovision, he decided. But then he really woke up, and went downstairs. There, on the Papa burner, was the pot, but the Papa burner drank all the liquid. The chicken looked a bit sad and a different color on the bottom of the pot. Remorsefully, the man put more water in the pot and scraped the bottom of his pot and placed it on the baby burner. He would not have any chicken soup today.

The moral of the story is: An unwatched pot always burns out, or, Use Papa's powers only when you are in the kitchen.
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